Mike C. – Movie Reviews: You’re Still Writing!

Posted by Mike Crane on Sep 12, 2009 in Featured Articles, Films & TV, Mike C., Reviews, Tutorials & More, Writing, [ i ]NKWEST | View Comments

REVIEWING FILM

Are you a film lover? Do you get passionate over certain movies and are always willing to discuss or debate with others? You may want to consider reviewing movies, if that’s the case. You don’t have to be a certified critic to do it. There are plenty of non-paying places like Amazon where you can have your voice heard, or you could seek out other places that may offer payment or free movies for you to review (if you’re looking for the second option, then it’s good to practice reviewing on sites like Amazon, that way you have some examples you can send).I’m a film lover. In no way am I a professional critic, but I think I have the chops to write out a review here and there when the mood strikes me. Plus, it’s another grand excuse to write. Remember, writing anything is better than nothing. It’s a great outlet if you’re stumped on whatever writing project you’re tackling at the moment, as it still forces you to exercise your writing skills.So how do you properly review a film? Well, there are many ways. I’m not here to tell you how to specifically do that. Again, I’m no professional, so I really have no right to tell you how to conduct a review. What I can do is offer some suggestions and walk you through on some of the things I consider when I’m doing a review. In no way is this meant to be a how-to. My only hope is that some of my caffeinated-induced babble will help so I can sleep better at night thinking that I’m actually doing something helpful. Seriously, that’s the truth right there.

WHATEVER YOU REVIEW, BE PASSIONATE!

If you’re doing reviews for fun and you’re in complete control of everything that you want to review, always choose something you’re passionate about. Writing a review for something that you really feel indifferent about can be rough. It makes sense. What kind of movie is easier for you to talk about with others? Something that left no impression whatsoever on you, or something that was able to get a rise out of you? And when I say be passionate, it doesn’t have to be positive. You can passionately hate something, too. We’ve all seen a movie here and there that left us with so much hatred that all we could do was rant about it for days and days. Write it in a review! Trust me, your friends will thank you for not having to hear you scream about the movie for the millionth time.

IF IT “ROCKS,” SAY WHY. IF IT “SUCKS,” SAY WHY.

While some professionals may frown if you use those two terms, it’s actually quite acceptable. You can say something sucks. You can say something rocks. However, explain why something sucks or rocks. Don’t say, “This movie sucks,” and leave it at that. “This movie rocks!” is equally annoying when there’s no explanation for it. Give reasons behind those opinions! “This movie sucked because the performances weren’t there and the writing was not only hacky, but also one-dimensional,” at least tells the story.

PLEASE, DON’T PULL A HOMER SIMPSON.

If you’re a fan of “The Simpsons,” then I’m sure you remember the classic scene where Homer went with Marge to see “The Empire Strikes Back” and comments to her as they’re leaving the theater that he couldn’t believe that Darth Vader was Luke’s father, only to meet the unpleasant groans of movie-goers who were waiting in line to see the next showing. As funny as that scene is, spoilers are no laughing matter. In fact, people often avoid reading reviews for fear of the reviewer giving away too much of the plot or secrets. Do your best to avoid this, and if you must give away something crucial, at least warn the reader before doing so. Also, there is nothing wrong with letting the reader know that your review is “spoiler-free.” Giving away spoilers is the most common sin that is committed when it comes to reviews, and even the professionals are guilty of this crime. Re-read your review many times just to be sure that you haven’t given away something that should be discovered when it is seen on the big screen for the very first time. I know, it can be rough not to give away details. Hell, when I wrote my review for “Inglourious Basterds” I had to restrain myself from giving away too much of the plot and story. Would my review have been better if I went into more detail? Certainly, but the person reading the review would have to suffer for it. Think carefully when it comes to writing about the story and plot. To me, that is the most important rule… and it is also the most difficult to follow.

SEE THE FILM MORE THAN ONCE.

Chances are there will always be something you missed the first time around with any film. It’s hard to get a concrete opinion down after just one viewing. I know this can be rough when you go to the theater and see movies. Rarely do we ever go and see a movie more than once until it comes out on DVD or Blu Ray. This is why I try to avoid reviewing theatrical releases, unless I feel that certain about it or if I was able to get another viewing. What’s great about reviewing something you own or have rented is you get another chance to re-visit the film. Especially since you already know what everything is leading to, it gives you the chance to actually appreciate the film that much more. You get to take in the sights and sounds without worrying about what’s going on or what’s going to happen next. Now, this isn’t a rule you have to always follow, but I guarantee that the review will come to you a lot easier if you’ve seen the film more than once.

BASH THE FILM… NOT THE VIEWER.

This isn’t really a rule. Many people, even the professionals, don’t follow this one. This for me, however, is more of a pet peeve. I cannot stand it when somebody ends up insulting people in his or her review. This is more common with negative reviews (although you can find a fair amount of it with the positive ones as well… Just search for “Citizen Kane” on Amazon and see how many of the positive reviews bash people for not liking the movie). To me, this is something that is totally uncalled for and destroys whatever credibility you might’ve had at the beginning of the review. Yes, we all have those movies we hate and can’t understand how other people can like the film in question… but you don’t have to hurl insults at people who didn’t feel the same way. Bash the movie, yes. By all means, go John Woo on that motherfucker!… but, let’s leave the actual viewers out of it, shall we? (Again, this should also apply to any positive review you do… don’t go insulting people who didn’t like the film that you are reviewing.) Is this a rule you have to follow? Nope. You’re free to say whatever the hell you want. All I’m doing is giving you my impression of people who do that. To me, one of the most important things about being a reviewer is being open-minded. What that means is you don’t necessarily have to like the movie you’re writing about, but try to understand how somebody may have a different opinion about it that doesn’t match yours. Film viewing is a very personal experience and we’re all going to have different opinions about what we just witnessed on the screen.

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